Warren Pellegrin (center) has been raising his four children, Kyle, 13, Sydney, 17, Shanna, 9, and Lindsay, 19 (not pictured), since his wife, Navy Lt. Corrine Pellegrin, died in 2001 from a virus she contracted while serving on the USS Ponce. He has shared his story to help others. SUZANNE CARR ROSSI/THE FREE LANCE-STAR

Warren Pellegrin and his daughter Lindsay, 19, share a snack with their dog, Commando. SUZANNE CARR ROSSI/THE FREE LANCE-STAR

Corinne Pellegrin died after contracting a virus. SUZANNE CARR ROSSI/THE FREE LANCE-STAR

Corinne earned her bachelor's degree in Hawaii in 1988. SUZANNE CARR ROSSI/THE FREE LANCE-STAR

Spotsylvania County father remembers his late wife's duty to family and country, especially on Independence Day

Date published: 7/4/2008

By CATHY DYSON

For years, Warren Pellegrin didn't talk about the way his wife's death affected him.

He didn't have time.

When Navy Lt. Corinne Pellegrin died in 2001 from a virus contracted at sea, she left behind four children, ages 2 to 11.

The Spotsylvania County father--who's also an FBI agent--had to focus on them. When he wasn't "busting bad guys" in Washington, he was dressing as Raggedy Andy and taking cupcakes to his daughter's birthday party at school.

Pellegrin never had the chance to talk about losing the wife he describes as a "studette," an energetic and athletic woman who put herself through college, then the rigors of Officer Candidate School six weeks after their second child was born.

He felt such a sense of duty to support her, he left the Marine Corps to take care of the children so she could go to sea. After her death, he continued wearing his wedding ring for five years.

He thought he was the luckiest man in the world when she said, "I do," and he hadn't been able to move forward without her.

Until Hollywood came calling.

Last Easter, after Pellegrin finished an egg hunt with the kids, he answered his FBI-issued BlackBerry and heard the voice of actor John Cusack on the other end.

Cusack was making a movie about a father who has to tell his children their mother has been killed in Iraq. The actor wanted to know how Pellegrin handled breaking news of his wife's death to their children, as well as other trials.

The actor and the widower talked for hours. Later, there were conversations with writer and producer James Strouse as the movie "Grace is Gone" was filmed.

After the movie premiered to a limited audience last winter, Pellegrin took calls from widowers and journalists and spoke to 600 military officers and reporters at the National Press Club in Washington in January.

When the group gave a standing ovation, a friend asked Pellegrin how he felt.

"It was almost like a burden was being lifted off my shoulders," he recalled. "It was a new year. A new beginning."

INDEPENDENT CHILDREN

Nothing makes Pellegrin prouder than his children. Lindsey, 19, has finished her freshman year at Mary Baldwin College in Staunton and wants to be a photojournalist.

OPERATION ENDURING FREEDOM Includes Afghanistan, the Philippines, Southwest Asia and other areas from October 2001 through April 5, 2008. Deaths: 487 Males: 474 Females: 13 OPERATION IRAQI FREEDOM From May 1, 2003 through April 5, 2008 Deaths: 3,866 Males: 3,774 Females: 92 ACTIVE-DUTY DEATHS Includes accidents, illnesses, hostile actions and self-inflicted incidents from 1980 through March 2003 Deaths: 34,408 Males: 32,578 Females: 1,830 --Source: Congressional Research Service Warren and Lt. Corinne Pellegrin spent 13 years on what he called a "Homer's Odyssey" of one naval school or duty station after another. At the time of her death in January 2001, she had just returned from an 18-month deployment. She was a supply officer assigned to the Ponce, an amphibious transport ship. She came home in December with flu-like symptoms. The family continued with its plans to make a cross-country trip to Texas to visit his mother. Two days before Christmas, Corinne's symptoms worsened and she was taken to the hospital. Doctors eventually determined that Corinne had contracted a virus, called fulminant myocarditis, while at sea. The condition is rare, but curable, but, by the time it was diagnosed, Corinne's system had shut down. She was 39 and had served in the Navy for 18 years. Warren Pellegrin got connected with the Hollywood movie "Grace is Gone" through TAPS, the Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors. TAPS offers a 24-hour crisis line; online support group; regional seminars; and national workshops and camps. More information is available at taps.org or 800/959-TAPS.

Date published: 7/4/2008