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Joanne Clurman, a 14-year breast cancer survivor, works on one of her pink and white quilts in her Spotsylvania home. They bring comfort to patients and others. |
By KIM BAER
The Secret Tears 2008 quilt that hangs in Pinkadilly Tea in Fredericksburg tells a story.
Each detail in the quilt is there for a reason, said Joanne Clurman, who created the quilt.
The quilt is filled with sparkles, for instance, because to her, "sparkles lift your spirits to keep you going in life."
The tears become fewer and the smiles grow bigger on the little faces drawn on the quilt, she noted.
"These little faces show the secrets to survival."
The quilt at the Fredericksburg tea shop is the second story quilt the Spotsylvania County woman has made.
The original Secret Tears quilt hangs at the Breast Center at the Anne Arundel Medical Center in Annapolis, Md.
Both quilts tell a story of hope and encouragement to survive.
The message is one that Clurman, a 14-year survivor of breast cancer, learned firsthand.
"I wouldn't be where I am today if I hadn't fought back to survive."
Life-changing news
Clurman, 58, hadn't planned to live a happy but solitary life quilting in the Spotsylvania County woods.
She spent more than 20 years as a homemaker in the Maryland suburbs.
The lively woman with twinkly blue eyes and elfin features raised three children and made quilts.
Then in 1993, she was diagnosed with breast cancer. Her doctor gave her a 17 percent chance of survival.
Her first thought: "I'm going to die."
She was treated at Johns Hopkins Hospital, where she had a double mastectomy, reconstruction and three months of chemotherapy.
She said she rode a padded gray elevator to her chemotherapy appointments in the hospital's underground "concrete catacombs."
The chairs were broken and there were no windows or flowers.
She was given a form of chemotherapy dubbed "The Red Devil" because of its color and its effect on patients.
"It brings you to your knees."
The recovery from surgeries and the chemotherapy sapped her energy. As soon as she could, she began working on squares for a quilt.
This quilt was unlike any she'd made before.
In one square, she drew a woman in tears looking out of a window.
This picture represented her. She had spent hours in her bathroom after she lost her hair to hide from the rest of the world.
As she painted the lyrics to the song "Smile" on the quilt, she recalled, she'd hum the tune to herself to lift her spirits up.
She donated the completed quilt to the Annapolis center, she wrote, "to give others hope while going through their journey with breast cancer."
The quilt was left behind when she moved to Virginia to start a new life.
After surgery, she said, the old Joanne never came back.
The diagnosis changed her husband, too.
"I actually think his spirit died with mine when they took me into surgery. Things were never the same after that, it changed our whole life."
She moved to the Fredericksburg area in 1997 after their marriage ended.
She worked a series of odd jobs, including at the Made in Virginia store. She started to make new friends and rebuild her life with a "new spirit."
But she didn't quilt. Quilting reminded her of happy times, and she wasn't happy. She felt she had lost everything after her marriage ended and her children had grown and gone.
She was left with "broken wings to pick up the pieces of [her] life again."
touching lives
Two years ago, on a trip to Ocean City with a friend, she ran into Darlene Wagner, an old friend she hadn't seen in 12 years.
After catching up for a bit, Wagner, a nurse, began telling Clurman about a quilt at the Breast Center in Annapolis.
Wagner didn't have breast cancer, but she had been going through some hard times.
The first time she saw the quilt, she felt as if it expressed everything she felt inside of her. She felt as if that quilt helped save her life. Clurman was dumbfounded.
"You're never going to believe this," Wagner recalled Clurman saying, "but that's my quilt."
Clurman later learned that the quilt now hangs behind the registration desk in the center.
Many patients hum the tune "Smile," just as she did, said Barbara Easterling, the center's director.
Registration officials will sometimes show new patients that the woman pictured in the quilt has fewer tears as her journey ends, she said.
"It's like a new beginning."
Starting a new business
Last year, Clurman's daughter-in-law was diagnosed with breast cancer.
After years away from the craft, Clurman decided to make her a pink-and-white quilt. She hoped it would keep her warm during chemotherapy and cheer her up.
She took it with her when she went up to Boston to help the family.
Her daughter-in-law took the quilt with her for a treatment. Others asked where she got the quilt and how they could get one.
This interest led to Clurman's decision to take up quilting again--this time, as a profession.
She opened her quilting business from her home this spring. She named it The Pink Journey.
"Everything that makes her smile," goes into her quilts, she wrote, and she wants others to feel that, too.
She sells small, medium and large quilts for $100 to $300 on her Web site,
The quilts aren't sold only to those with cancer. Some have been bought in honor of loved ones who have died of breast cancer.
Others have been bought by those who just want a pretty quilt.
After years of looking for direction, she has found her calling.
She makes people smile, and she believes she gives them hope and encouragement to survive.
"If I die tomorrow, I'd be OK," she said. "I did what I needed to do."
Kim Baer: 540/368-5028
Email: kbaer@freelancestar.com
| The Secret Tears 2008 quilt at Pinkadilly Tea in Fredericksburg will be raffled to raise money for breast cancer research.
Tickets are $20 for the October 15 raffle. Proceeds will go to Susan G. Komen for the Cure. Tickets are available at Pinkadilly, Bejeweled Designs on Caroline Street in Fredericksburg and at Dixie's Hair Studio and the Fredericksburg Jazzercise Studio, both on Lafayette Boulevard. The quilt's maker, Joanne Clurman, hopes the winner will donate the quilt to a breast cancer treatment center of his or her choice. She wrote that she will give the winner a replacement quilt of her own "as a thank-you." |
