Visit the Photo Place

Battle lines are drawn when school project hits 11th hour

48 hours with Douglas MacArthur

Date published: 11/6/2009

By Edie Gross

I HAVE A BONE TO pick with Douglas MacArthur.

The late general kept me up well past my bedtime last week after a member of my household--who will remain nameless--decided to write a report about him for her sixth-grade history class.

Actually, now that I think about it, my irritation may have been misplaced. My apologies to the general.

The young historian in question had to do a project on a veteran of her choosing. Waving several pages of hand-written notes in front of me, she announced that she'd chosen MacArthur.

Me: So why'd you choose MacArthur?

Her: Because he was a great man.

Me: Well, tell me something about him.

Her: He was a man.

Me: Uh, yeah, well that's probably a good thing. Girls named "Douglas" tend not to turn out so well. But what kind of a man was he?

Her: A great man.

Me: OK, yeah, well you sort of covered that. But why was he great?

Her: Because he did great things.

Me: What things?

Her: Great things.

Me: But what kind of great things?

Her: The kind of things that are great.

Me: Permission to declare the witness "hostile," your honor.

I sensed that the project lacked a bit in the way of specifics and suggested that the young historian spend a few days acquainting herself with MacArthur's actions during World War I, World War II and the Korean War.

That's when I learned the project was due in two days. Hence, the late nights, spent plowing through biographical information and trying to distill 50 years of military history down to a half-dozen five-sentence paragraphs.

It'd be easy to get mad at her for waiting until the last minute if I hadn't done the same thing myself once. OK, maybe twice.

I vividly remember sitting with my mother at the dining-room table late one evening in 1984 when I, too, had waited until the night before it was due to start a school report.

I think it was on the Panama Canal, which, as I recall, was also a great man, though perhaps not as great as MacArthur.

I'm sure you can imagine the conversation:

Mom: So what can you tell me about the Panama Canal?

Me: It's a great canal.

Mom: What's so great about it?

Me: It does great things.

Mom: What kind of things?

Follow us on

Read more stories about Fredericksburg
Date published: 11/6/2009