In addition to expressing his disapproval about recent Middle East violence, the president should do the following:
1. Now is the time for a robust sermon on the brotherhood of men (and women) with, if possible, a choir in the background singing "Kumbaya."
2. To soothe the ruffled feathers of the young demonstrators--under no circumstances must the term "Islamic terrorists" be used--I would also suggest that in addition to a robust apology we should offer them a financial pittance of perhaps $100 million, which would illustrate to the world the quality of our president's statesmanship.
Now I must go find a secluded place to be sick.
George J. Vanek
Spotsylvania